wHeN i sAY i mIsS yOu, fRoM tHe bOtToM oF mY hEaRt iT iS tRuE. wHeN i sAY i MiSs yOu, i hOpE yOu aRe mIssIng mE tOo. wHen i sAY i mIsS yOu, i pRaY tHaT yOu'LL mAKE iT tHrOuGh. wHeN i sAY i mIsS yOu, i wIsH tO sEe yOu rEaLLy sOoN. bOy, i dO mIsS yOu. dOn'T eVeR dOubT tHat, tHoUgH oUr fRieNdsHiP mAY bE nEw...
yEah... hAd a nIcE tImE wItH nEL jAsC jIaLi aNd yOnGLiNg... nEL wEnT sA lOoK fOr mE... tHen rOtTeD aBiT bEfOrE wEnT tOwN mEeT tHe rEsT... hAd dInNeR aT cRoWN pRiNcE sWeNsOn'S... cHaTtEd aBiT tHeN wALkEd tO mRt tAkE tRaIn hOmE...
wiLL bE mEeTiNg aGaIn oN sUndAy fOr dInNeR aT cHaNgI aIrpOrT... sEnDInG neL oFf yOu sEe... yUpZ...
gEr aR.. eNjOy uRsELf iN jApAN oRh... tAKE GOOD cArE oF uRsELf... eSp nOw yOu nOt fEeLiNg wEll yEaH... jUsT dUn fOrGeT tO mIsS mE!~ wAhaHaHAhA...
hereby i put a fullstop... to end the story we wrote. or in fact, the fairy tale i wrote. i want to be strong. and i realise that to do that, i have to stop everything. i don't want to see you, as much as i wish to. i thought i could handle the turmoil within me surfacing and subsiding again and again. guess i was wrong. i've been hurt before and the scar's still visible... i give up... and by saying so... i hope i can do it. i hate you sometimes. why did you do all the things that you did? you don't know how important your actions were to me... you obviously did not consider the consequences. i hate myself too. well, probably it was my fault that the story can't go on... there's just too much to think about and i cannot stand that. why did i care so much in the first place? why can't i just turn away everytime you call out to me? why can't i just understand that your words meant no much more meaning than you actually meant? cos i feel for you dumbo. duh... do i even understand what i'm writing?
i know i may regret it someday... for things i never done or said... or things i've done or said. i'm holding back? probably... cos i'm not sure whether my otherwise actions will be worth it. there is no choice for me. you may think i'm enlarging on my problem... alright, i'm self-centered. but i don't care! i have the right to be sometimes yeah? stop being kind will you? i know deep within you you don't wish to be kind... for that means you are not true... not true to yourself... i hate you... i really do man. i hate it when you make things seem the way they are when they actually are not like that! oh well, i sound like i'm reprimanding myself... i don't know. maybe yeah... like hiding from alot of things. i'm sorry... you have the right to your future... whatever. i just give up... please don't let me see you again... for i'm afraid if i ever see you again... i'll crumble to my very last bit of strength. i'm proud. i don't want you to see me collapse...
i'm sad, for ___ are not here for me... ___ cannot hear me... ___ cannot see me too... i want to cry out to ___ badly... but i'm not sure whether i'd be able to bring myself to... i'm afraid what will happen if i do... am i protecting myself way too much? i think so... but i guess i cannot help it... oh well... i'll be learning to let go... afterall i've learnt to before... probably more reluctant this time... why did i ever know you? shite... i'm really weary... lethargy's eating me up... what the hell... hopefully tmr will be better... much much better...
A star once asked me, "Since he made you so sad, why don't you leave him alone?" I smiled and replied, "Would you ever leave the sky?"
"iN tHe wHoLe wOrLd, yOu mAy bE jUsT oNe pErSon. bUt tO oNe pErSoN, yOu mAy bE tHe wHoLe wOrLd..."
